Be open to new experiences… be open to trying new things and meeting new people… open all the doors you find in your way and something good will always come out of this… and if you cannot open the doors yourself, do everything in your power to find some way or someone who can do it for you… have your doors, much like your arms, open for everybody, nothing bad can come of it… How about knowing when to close those metaphorical doors – on a chapter of your life, on a person, on a situation? Isn’t that sort of knowledge underrated, the same way both the open doors of our heart policy and the people who can open all sorts of doors for us are many times overrated?
It occurred to me that the older we get, the more difficult it becomes not only to be open to new challenges, but to actually close the door and put an end to undesirable situations we might find ourselves in; instead, we fool ourselves into thinking we might fix everything, we might change whatever isn’t working properly, when in fact we do know when something has escalated to a point beyond return or repair. But doesn’t one determine the other? Aren’t we afraid to close the door on certain people or contexts simply because we dread the moment when yet again we have to start over? We have already been through it so many times, that in spite of the experience and endurance gained, we risk it becoming a habit. The routine of disappointment mixed with stubbornness and hope can sometimes blur out the warning signs and we fail to see and / or accept that we need to move on once more.
Walking away without looking back can prove challenging these days… it used to be different. I was reading one of Lillian’s poems earlier, one memory lead to another and I got to have flashbacks of how easy letting go used to be. It took two ballet lessons to understand that activity wasn’t meant for me and move on to something else. When I was in kindergarten, it took me 10 minutes to understand that the boy I liked for months was a bore, all it took was the courage to go and play with him; once I realized that, I stood up and left, to never talk to or care about him again. Sure, we’re not children anymore, the complexity of our lives can often be overwhelming and nothing is either black or white, all the shades in between become unbearable and suffocating at times. But when have we forgotten that any doors we might have opened willingly or otherwise at some point can also be closed? When have we become so unable to just close the door behind us and walk away?…